Stupid Ideas
by Pop.Pop.Bubble.Gum
Summary: Kevin x Ben x Gwen trio. One-shot. In which Kevin and Ben explain to Gwen why Ben is covered in bruises.


A/N: Prepare yourself for my Ben 10 OT3! Just a random thought I had while tired. Expect plenty of OOCness.

This has slash (gay guys), cousinxcousin incest, and threesomeness. Don't like, get out of here now.

Disclaimer: I disclaim.

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Gwen handed Kevin the First Aid Kit, and though she refrained from asking if they were idiots, she was giving Kevin and Ben a look that clearly said she thought they were.

Kevin went about opening the First Aid Kit and pulling out cleaning alcohol and cotton swabs. "All right, Tennyson, top to bottom or bottom to top?"

"Top to bottom," Ben said immediately, trying to refrain from opening his mouth too much as he spoke lest he aggravate his split lip.

Kevin grinned at some personal joke but set to work at pouring alcohol on one of the cotton swabs and dabbing it against the many small cuts and bruises on Ben's face. He seemed amused whenever Ben winced or hissed in pain, and Ben would have glared had that not hurt his currently black eye too much.

"Can I ask what you were thinking?" Gwen asked, interrupting the seconds that had ticked by in silence. She eyed Ben's tattered appearance and then Kevin's unhampered form. Her cousin had clearly drawn the short end of the stick.

"We were just having some fun," Kevin answered immediately, then chuckled as Ben tried to lean back from a particularly harsh sting of alcohol. "Don't move, you're making it harder on yourself."

"I will get back at you for this," Ben swore, but he allowed Kevin to resume the first aid.

Gwen sighed as she moved a few things in the First Aid Kit and retrieved a box of band-aids. "Did you have fun?" She asked, the sarcasm clear in her voice. Kevin shifted over to allow Gwen the chance to start putting the band-aids on Ben's face.

"I did," Kevin said cheerily, earning himself a particularly fierce glare from Ben before the expression had to be erased to avoid the pain.

Gwen put a purple band-aid across Ben's nose. "So what exactly were you doing again?"

Kevin and Ben had given Gwen a summarized account of what had happened upon showing up on her doorstep with Ben looking a right mess. Ben dreaded telling her the detailed version, since he could look back now and see how the idea was a bruised mess waiting to happen. Kevin, on the other hand, still thought it was pretty damn funny. He'd come out unharmed, after all.

"We were recounting that time when he turned into Alien X," Kevin started, setting aside the alcohol and retrieving some lotion/cream from the First Aid Kit for the bruises. "He wanted to know what we were doing when he was stuck with those creepy face things."

"And you told him about absorbing the rubber from the car tire," Gwen said, already having heard that part. She smiled a bit as she stuck a bright pink band-aid on Ben's chin.

"Yup. Then Benji here got curious as to--what was it, Tennyson?"

"What you looked like as a--ow! Watch it!" Ben pulled away as Kevin pushed too hard on one of his bruises. Kevin said something about not being a baby and pulled Ben forward to continue the work. Ben scowled at him, then winced.

"What Kevin looked like as...?" Gwen prompted, chuckling as she placed a glitter-covered band-aid on Ben's forehead.

"As a rubber ping-pong ball," Ben deadpanned, giving Kevin a blank look that probably would have translated to something very angry had Ben been able to properly use facial expressions.

"Right, that was it," Kevin agreed. He replaced a few things to the First Aid Kit before trying to push Ben's jacket off his shoulders.

Months in a relationship with Gwen and Kevin didn't stop Ben from blushing now. "What are you doing?" He demanded as he pushed Kevin back.

Kevin rolled his eyes. "Top to bottom, Tennyson, remember? How am I supposed to bandage you up with your clothes on? Don't be a girl, it's just your jacket... for now."

"Don't be a girl," Gwen repeated under her breath, shooting an annoyed look at Kevin. It didn't seem to bother him.

"I'm not taking off more than my shirt," Ben grumbled as he shrugged off his jacket by himself. He thought it over, then pulled off his shirt as well. He winced as he moved, and once the shirt was gone, it was obvious why.

Gwen looked Ben over again, frowning at her black-and-blue cousin. His face and hands were the only things that had suffered broken skin, but he'd certainly banged himself up good and well, seeing as he was covered in bruises of various size and color. His parents were never going to believe he ended up that way messing around with Kevin. It was pure luck that Ben hadn't broken any bones.

In a show of his lack of sympathy, Kevin poked at the darkest bruise on Ben's side, and, ignoring Ben's reaction, said, "You sure are delicate to end up with all these bruises, Benji."

"If you got knocked all over your stupid garage, you'd look like this, too!" Ben snapped angrily, hitting Kevin's hand though he'd long since backed off. "Poke me like that again and I swear _you won't get anything for a month_!"

"Like you could last that long," Kevin shot back, but he wouldn't poke at Ben's bruises again. An unfortunate point of their relationship was that if one didn't want to have physical contact with another, they could turn to the third for any need fulfillment and actually last that whole month. Granted, so could the one being denied, unless sides were taken.

"At least pretend to be mature," Gwen insisted as she fished out some gauze and medical tape to cover up some of the nastier bruises with. It was unneeded, but considering that Kevin and Ben might be rough-housing with each other if they kept arguing like this, she figured a little extra padding would help Ben out. "And finish the story. How did Kevin absorbing rubber end up with Ben like this?"

"Hold on," Kevin said, stopping Gwen from applying the first gauze pad. "We should put some ice over some of these first. I'll be back in a sec." Kevin then disappeared into the kitchen, temporarily leaving Gwen and Ben to their own devices.

Gwen held the gauze and tape awkwardly for a moment before setting it aside at the top of the First Aid Kit. "You're gonna be sore for days," She commented, silently counting Ben's bruises.

"I know. Hanging out with Kevin is more dangerous than being a Plumber."

"Yeah, really," Gwen agreed with a little laugh. She knew she'd come home from Plumber work with her fair share of bruises, but she couldn't remember a time as of recent that she looked as if she'd been hit by a particularly large bus. "So, do you wanna finish the story for me?"

"Hm? Oh, right..." Ben frowned as the story replayed on high speed in his mind. What a stupid idea it had been. "Let's see. Kevin absorbed the rubber from a spare tire in that garage he's always working at, and bounced all over the place like a ball. It looked like fun, so..." He trailed off, more than obviously embarrassed at the stupidity of it all. "I said I wanted to try."

Gwen quirked a brow. "You wanted to try bouncing off the walls?"

"I told him it was a bad idea," Kevin interjected, having returned with a bowl of ice, a plastic baggie, and a damp washcloth. He started to put together a do-it-yourself ice pack as he picked up the story where Ben had left off. "He wanted me to hold onto him and bounce around again. And it was a stupid idea, wasn't it?"

"You could have mentioned reasons for why it was a bad idea," Ben griped, remembering how Kevin had scoffed but not bothered to explain himself.

"I thought you said you two were having fun," Gwen said suspiciously.

"Well, we did it, didn't we?" Kevin replied, finishing up his at-home ice pack by wrapping the washcloth around the ice-filled bag then pressing it against one of the many bruises on Ben's chest. Ben let out a hiss of pain but managed to stay still. "And it was fun, but before I agreed, I did say it was a dumb idea. Anyway, I picked Benji up and jumped, and that was the end of it. It's not like I can control myself very well when I'm made of rubber and bouncing off walls and spare parts in a repair garage. Benji didn't take into account he'd be hitting all of that stuff as himself and ended up like this."

"Except for this," Ben said, pointing to some spot on his face that was covered in enough small injuries for the specific one to be lost among plenty of others. "Because Kevin dropped me in a pile of car parts!"

"That was an accident."

"Well," Gwen said loudly before they could start bickering. "At least you know better than to do it again." She leaned forward and kissed Ben on the nose, right over the purple band-aid. "I'm going to go online and see if there's any tips on how to take care of this many bruises. Kevin, don't torture my cousin, all right?"

"No promises," Kevin said cheekily. Gwen smiled; Ben frowned.

Kevin moved the ice pack to another bruise while retrieving the gauze Gwen had abandoned with his free hand. "Hold this in place, Benji," He ordered, putting pressure on the ice pack so Ben would know what he was talking about. Ben did so without argument and Kevin put the gauze over the bruise that had already received the ice treatment. Gwen watched Kevin work for only a few seconds before leaving to do said internet research, but as soon as she had moved to the next room, the torture commenced. Gwen could hear them from the stairs, but didn't bother to go back and save her cousin.

"Benji, you look cold. Is that ice a little much for you? Let me warm you up."

"Ack! Kevin, don't! I'm in pain!"

"Don't be a baby."

"Kev--mmhmphm!"

A few bruises were not about to stop Kevin from his (practically rape-laced and completely physical) apology.

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A/N: Apologize with kisses and molestation, because actions speak louder than words. XD  
Here's hoping Gwen's missing parents don't show up in the middle of the molestation. .__.  
Yeah. ;D Random shit written right before I go to bed -stares tiredly at stairs-. W00t. I'm just happy because I have trouble writing Ben 10 in third person and this one didn't give me trouble. Ahem. If you're thinking that Ben was really stupid here with the rubber thing, he was. And so was Kevin, he's just making himself look smarter. Gwen thinks they're stupid right now, too. While Kevin and Ben are generally just a mild version of boy-stupid, it is a proven fact (in my world) that people lose IQ points in groups, and therefore stupider things will be done than what they would do on their own. That is my excuse!


End file.
